Thursday, August 28, 2014

Inward Becomes Outward

    Based on a conversation I had with a dear friend on Monday, this post today.

    All of us go through numerous stages and periods in our lives.  We feel jubilant, defeated, lonely, loved, at sea and on track.  No matter what process we are working with, our inner self begs to express itself in the way we present ourselves to the world. 
    In the case of my friend, she is going through significant personal changes; changes of employment, and very likely even the nation in which she lives.  She told me that as she has been going along she finds that the clothing in her wardrobe, that used to be her go to stuff, the dresses and skirts she frequently wore, and the particular colors that were favorites, now seem not to suit her.  We talked about it a good deal between us, and determined that a desire to move into a creative path that is essentially a private pursuit, (writing), could manifest itself in a lessening of desire for a prominent public face.  So she finds herself choosing clothing that is quieter, less of a look at me statement.
   I know that for myself, since I've struggled life long with weight issues and attendant body dysmorphia stuff, my apparel choices have shifted radically over time, again and again.  When I was in my heavy weight phase I chose over large shirts in big patterns that disguised, ( so I thought) my bulk.  When I was in my gym going phase, my clothes were tight and body con.  It is only after decades of ups and downs, and much introspection, that now at 57, I have come to a full enough understanding of myself to live in my own light and be true to my inner nature, without regard to what others determine to be right or wrong.  So I am being more and more bold in my color choices, and allowing the peacock that has lurked within to spread his glorious feathers at last.  Does any of this have to do with this blog, and how much time I spend daily considering such matters?  Of COURSE it does.  And I am aware, as well, that if I am going to write about Attire as a language, I damned well better speak it with erudition myself.
    So the point I'm working towards here is this; whatever place you find yourself in internally, don't attempt to ride along in the same apparel you've always chosen. You have changed, and will continue to do so. Allow your choices of clothing and adornments to change with you.  When we resist this sort of change, we are first, personally, increasingly uncomfortable. Then those who see us perceive a discomfort and disjunction when they look at us. They can tell, subconsciously, that something isn't quite right: that we don't fit the skin we are in. 
    Whatever your inner place, live in it and be it.
  Whatever your aspirations, live in them if they are true to you, and all who see you will note it, and know them to be true.

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