Every one of us desires one time or another to either follow the pack, or break away from it. For some of us, diverging from the normative is a dangerous thing we shy from, and so it takes extraordinary things to make it to fruition. For others of us, adhering to the common ideals is anathema. So, let's be honest with each other, shall we? All of us push the limits now and then. We did it as children, trying to learn what was okay, and what wasn't. We did it as teenagers, wondering what we could get away with. We do it as adults, knowing what the realities are, and playing them when we can, to get what we want. Some of us even exceed those boundaries, and get away with it because on some level our culture approves our transgressions. We applaud those who push at the limits, but not too far. There is always a "too far" to be dealt with.
Yep, thass me.
But, what does it mean, socially, societally, to transgress, to exceed, to push the edges of the normative? What do we gain, and what do we suffer? Well, the results are significant on both sides of the question. We gain a good deal, because we learn ourselves more truly, and become stronger people as a result. We might even gain the superficial approval of the culture at large. But we divorce ourselves eternally from the mass of the world, who will not comprehend what we do, or accept it even if they do partially understand. Those who might admire us for our differences, do not understand us fully. They can only yearn to be more open themselves, and so, desire to be like us.
Some of us, and I admire you, all of you, have the fortitude to brave the discontent of the world and chart your own path without thought of consequence. Brava, and Bravo. Most of us, like me, have chosen a middling path. We challenge, but only meekly. We question, but quietly. We stretch, but in small moves.
I realize as a man who wore a skirt/kilt every day for over a decade I could hardly call my challenge meek in small terms. But when I look at the conviction that others bring to their visual self, (and I see these people daily in my city of San Francisco), I am humbled by my small dissents. When I look at those who choose to have no defined sartorial identity, I am humbled. They go where I feared, and most of us fear to tread. And they lead us, and the Attire language as a whole, into new territory while they go there.
Viewed from another point, I am proud that I took, and take my own stance, regardless of what some might surmise about me. That my choice of dissonance was relatively mild is of no matter. The point is that I chose it. The larger point is that we all can choose it. Whoever you are, whatever you do, wherever you live, and whatever you life is like, you do have the choice to move into your own expressive sphere, however limited it might be by circumstance. You have the right, and more importantly, (though others might deny you), you have the power.
And let me say this now and for always. It doesn't matter one little bit if you can afford a huge designer wardrobe of the latest of everything. Money has nothing to do with style, personal expression, and a facility with the Attire language. What it has to do with is a willingness to look at what is to hand and make it YOURS in caps with lights around it. Find what works, really works for you, what expresses in honest terms what you most need to say, and then make of it your own visual voice.
Even if it is only a scrap of ribbon snatched from a rag bin, you have the choice to take that small thing and make something new of yourself that has no reference to anyone but you.
Sure, I see this through the lens of the Attire language, but it resonates through the rest of our lives. Make of yourself what you most desire. What others think is of little matter. Not a size 2? Who cares? Not 24? So what? Didn't make 10 million last year? What's that mean? No big dick, no big boobs, no six pack abs or long legs? Join the real world, baby. We all have our beauties, it remains to each of us to find them within ourselves, and move them forward.
What means something in the last is that you communicate your true self to the people around you. Do it with your deeds, your words, and yes, your Attire too. It doesn't take huge amounts of money. Much can be done with little. It doesn't require designer labels. Couture isn't the answer.
All that is required, is you, straight, no chaser.
No comments? What's wrong with people? This is a manifesto, a great post.
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